Profile of a Woman in an Abusive Relationship

People in abusive relationship often have common characteristics and beliefs.  They will often:

• Blame herself and take responsibility for the abusive behaviour of her partner; believe her actions cause the abuse, and, in some way, excuse the abusive actions
• Tend to be passive rather than assertive in her interpersonal relationship
• Be socially isolated by her partner and lack substantial support networks of friends or relatives
• Tend to 'give in' as a way to survive
• Have low self esteem; see herself as incompetent, unworthy, unlovable and may be ridden with guilt and shame; believe if she had 'gotten it right', the abuse would not be occurring
• Tend to feel depressed and/or have suicidal thoughts or behaviours
• Have injuries which do not match the explanation she gives
• Be econimically and emotionally dependant upon her partner
• Be deeply concerned about her children's welfare and support; and will frequently remain in the the relationship because 'children need a father'
• Believe her partner will change because he isn't always violent, and is sometimes loving and kind
• Tend to minimize the violence as a way of coping with the pain in her life
• Prolonged use of drugs such as tranquilizers, antidepressants
• The intermittent or continual presence of stress reaction such as tension, hyperactivity, headaches, insomnia, pain in the back, chest or stomach.

Source: Central Alberta Child and Family Services Authority (CFSA)
http://www.centralalbertacfsa.gov.ab.ca